Check All That Apply

We all have our different perspectives.

You may view me as an incredibly happy person due to the fact that you've only scraped past one layer of me. There is nothing wrong with that. Sometimes I just need people to see me as purely blissful without a stress in the world.

You may view me as an neurotic since I'm constantly saying, doing, and acting differently from the public. You may possibly just be a stranger on your way to a Chem lab while I'm returning from my Sociology class occasionally exchanging eye contact. You can give me that smile while I return it with a blank stare. Or, I can be that really vexatious teenager sitting with a couple of friends on the opposite side of a restaurant. You can be the reserved adult occasionally passing an outlandish look on your face in response to all the commotion. But, I can be that guy curled up in my bed, observing the minutes pass by....completely knowing that that will be the last time the clock reads the same time on that given date.

You may view me as a anxious person because I'm a 19 year old child afraid of growing up and being alone. Being afraid of disappointing my peers, community, and family is only half the battle. I'm afraid that I will go unnoticed. I'm terrified that I'm going to be that reclusive old man in a two bedroom apartment living with 5 dogs... the guy who is brainwashed by the dying American Dream of a white collared, 'married with children' guy with a structured settlement living in the safe suburbs. I won't settle for that. I won't be that person, no matter how many times I get yelled at for piercing my ear, wearing tight clothes, or thoughts of getting a noticeable tattoo.

You may view me as a loner resting on the fact alone that you have not met me. Sure, you may know I'm Sam Rosen and that I love my vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles. But, have you dug inside my cursivemind? Have you even experienced something life changing with me? Have you ever held my hand, not because we're dating, but because we are scared? Have you ever asked about my past, my problems now, or what my plans are for the future? Have you ever checked up on me after a full day of confinement? Do you know why I smile, laugh, cry, panic?

Maybe you haven't even met me yet. You are possibly somewhere in Dallas, Texas while I'm stuck here in this college cell, rotting away while I watch sitcoms all day. Scribbling my notes onto lined notebook paper, slowly losing my mind. Maybe our paths will intersect someday, Dallas. And when that day comes, Who will I be?

Sam