Selfish Child

Life just caught up to me. It sometimes amazes me that I made it to see 18.

I remember as a child, I was taught two important words from my father: Sharing and Patience. Back then, sharing meant giving away a spoonful of my delicious vanilla ice cream and patience meant I couldn't get the new Backstreet Boys CD the first day it came out. Dad kept reinstalling those two words into my brain and kept saying that those are the two most important words to live by.

I was and still am a selfish boy. I wish I could have listened to my father's wisdom because I know that he meant well. He is the complete opposite of me. He is generous and patient and charitable. Everything I'm not. I dwell on myself and never the bigger picture. It's always: Yeah, there are starving kids in Africa and I feel awful for them, but I can't just ship my leftover food to them. Always making up excuses of why I shouldn't do something I really don't want to do.

I ideally want to become the person who would send the Africans a nice full course meal with napkins and forks and expensive dinner plates.

I have a job
I have a home
I have a proper education
I have two wonderful, loving parents
I have the most loyal and unforgettable family
I have a bed to sleep in
I have food to eat
I have the latest technology
I have friends
I have a car.

How many impoverished people can say that? Why am I the lucky one while others don't? I dont even think giving all I have to them would make me any happier because my selfish ego would want it back.

Sam